TRAGIC: Man Has To Find A New Show To Watch As Depp Trial Comes To A Close
6/2/2022 by Caleb Townsend
Tragedy struck today as Nevin See is faced with the hardest decision of his life - finding a new form of entertainment in lieu of watching the Depp-Heard trials.
"I've loved every second of this media circus" See said. "But now I guess I have to move on and find something else to watch. People keep telling me to watch The Wire, but there are so many characters to keep track of! Barry? Bill Hader is great but I dunno..."
See was an avid viewer of the trials, and considered them to be the pinnacle of entertainment.
"I know it's a domestic abuse case and that televising it is a craven act that capitalizes on the most heinous instincts of every America," said See. "But it's just so damn entertaining. What show can replicate that? Succession? Twin Peaks? Please, there's no way."
See has reportedly avoided watching any of the shows on his watch list, having not even gotten past that "damn episode with the fly" in Breaking Bad.
"Like a fly? I wanna see a show with big moments," See said. "Not a bunch of weirdos freaking out over a fly. I know I stopped watching, but in my opinion, the show has jumped the shark."
See plans on watching many shows in his lifetime, listing Hee Haw, Star Trek, Euphoria, Teen Titans, Friday Night Lights, and Seinfeld as shows he "plans" on watching, just as soon as he's done "watching King of The Hill for the 8th time in a row."